I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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