i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
