remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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