i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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