this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
The chlamydia really affected his face.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize
