just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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