and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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