You can't special order awesome
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
