So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
