I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cut my penus on the lid.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
be right there i have to get my cape
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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