Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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