are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
