Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
