We're like a lot better than the average bears
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
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