Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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