I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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