i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
