so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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