I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Randomize
