It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize