My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
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Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
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I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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