thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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