The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
