Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
