please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
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exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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