You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
he puts the penis in happiness.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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