If i come over, it means nothing
nut hugger
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I want to be your penis for a week.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
