they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
