susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
