I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
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