Its about making memories worth repressing
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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