Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
