your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize