Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
