did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Randomize