oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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