i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I wish you could order shots online.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
