She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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