i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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