Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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