Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
