we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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