So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Best friends brother. Beat that.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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