He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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