I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize