Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
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my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
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Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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