yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
