so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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