butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Just invented taco cereal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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