We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize